You ever write something, read it back, and instantly hate it? Yeah. Been there. Still go there sometimes. For the longest time, I believed that good writing meant perfect writing flawless grammar, clever metaphors, smooth transitions, you name it. I’d sit there rereading the same sentence for 20 minutes, just to delete it anyway. Sound familiar?

But here’s the kicker: the more I obsessed over making everything “right,” the more I lost the voice in my writing. It started sounding like a user manual. Not a story. Not a thought. Not me.

If you're a writer or even someone who just writes occasionally you probably get this. We all want our stuff to be good. But what if chasing perfect is what’s holding us back?

Let me tell you what changed for me and how letting go of perfect actually made my writing... better.

The Myth of the “Real” Writer

Okay, quick confession: for the longest time, I thought real writers were those people who sat down every morning with coffee, opened their MacBook, and just flowed. Like, they knew what they wanted to say, had some poetic thought, and BAM novel chapter.

Meanwhile, I’d open a blank doc and spiral into an existential crisis. Do I even have something worth saying? Should I Google “how to write compelling content”? Should I go get a snack and pretend I am brainstorming?

Turns out, most writers even the pros don’t feel like “real” writers half the time. They struggle. They procrastinate. They draft garbage before they get to gold. The difference is, they know that’s part of the gig.

Writing Ugly First

One of the best things I ever did was give myself permission to write badly on the first go. I call it “writing ugly.” No backspacing. No fixing typos. Just dumping thoughts onto the page like you’re venting to a friend. That’s where the magic starts.

You can’t edit a blank page, but you can shape a messy one into something real. And trust me, sometimes the best lines come out of the chaos.

A buddy of mine who freelances full-time told me he once turned in a blog post after two hours of panicked writing at 1 AM. He thought it was trash. The client said it was “some of the most authentic writing they’d read.” Go figure.

The Pressure to Be Perfect (Especially Online)

If you post anything online, you know how intense it can get. Everyone’s judging. Everyone’s scrolling. You feel like if you post something that isn’t sharp, witty, or quote-worthy, you’ll just disappear into the void.

This is even worse if you’re trying to build something like a writing career, a portfolio, or a blog. You want every post, every caption, every article to hit hard. That pressure? It’ll wreck your creativity if you let it.

I used to spend hours tweaking Medium drafts because I was scared some stranger might think my sentence structure was awkward. But guess what? People don’t remember your sentence structure. They remember how your writing made them feel.

The Voice They Told You Not to Use

Here’s a hot take: your “unprofessional” voice is probably your strongest writing tool. The way you talk to your friends? The slang, the weird phrasing, the honest confessions? That’s what people connect to.

I used to try writing these super polished think pieces with big words and academic vibes. They bombed. Then I wrote a rant about my caffeine addiction and how I used coffee to survive a brutal semester and it blew up. Why? Because people felt seen.

This doesn’t mean you should write like you're texting your ex at 2 AM. But it does mean you should sound like a human being, not a brand or a textbook. Be raw. Be weird. Be honest.

When I Needed Help, I Asked For It

Let me be real for a sec: not every piece of writing can or should be a solo mission. There were times in school when I had five papers due, no energy, and absolutely zero inspiration. I used to feel guilty even thinking about outsourcing help.

But honestly? Sometimes you need it. Just like you'd call a plumber instead of learning how to fix a busted pipe overnight, it is fine to get support with writing too.

I once hit a wall during my senior thesis. After a week of spiraling, I ended up using a dissertation writing help service to get feedback and structure ideas. Was it cheating? Nah. It was surviving. And the draft I submitted after working with them? The best thing I’d written that year.

Help doesn’t make you weak. It keeps you in the game.

What Changed When I Let Go

The moment I stopped obsessing over perfect grammar and “writerly” language, a few surprising things happened:

• I started writing faster because I wasn’t second-guessing every word.

• My stuff felt more me like I wasn’t putting on a voice, just saying what I meant.

• People connected more because honesty beats polish, every time.

I’m not saying throw all grammar rules out the window. I’m just saying: don’t let them stop you from starting. Write first. Clean it up later.

Real Writers Write. Period.

So yeah, you don’t need a book deal, a writing degree, or a perfect outline to be a “real” writer. You just need to show up. Write messy. Say what you mean. Ask for help when you need it.

Oh—and if you’re stuck staring at a blinking cursor right now? Try writing the worst version of what you want to say. Just go for it. You can’t fix what’s not written. But you can turn trash into treasure.

And if you ever find yourself buried in deadlines, asking, "Can you do my essay?"  well, you are not alone. Been there. No shame.

Got Something to Say? Say It.

Writing is a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. But that doesn’t mean you need to be Hemingway every time you open Google Docs. Write like you talk. Break the rules sometimes. Tell your story even if it’s a little rough around the edges.

If this post made you feel a little less alone in the writing struggle, share it. Comment. Or better yet go write your own messy, honest piece today.

Because you? You’re already a real writer.